Is alimony fair reddit. Not a single one has received spousal support.

Is alimony fair reddit Sometimes life isn’t fair. Then you can maybe get employment down there and Alimony, division of assets, etc. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Alimony seems reasonable post divorce in most cases bc every study shows women do much worse economically after divorce although those gaps do seem to be narrowing. All is fair in love and war. At the end of the day, a grown adult should not be entitled to another grown adult's money just because they used to be married to that person. You provide a clean home, child care and meals, etc. Could they realistically then say, “your honor I’ve become accustomed to a standard of living and need alimony payments because as you can see they make 150k and I make nothing” or conversely, “your honor they’re clearly the breadwinner, I couldn’t possibly pay them alimony” We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. lifetime alimony I wish people would stop spreading this myth. Alimony is fair and just and makes perfect sense in most Your lawyer > Reddit advice. Or check it out in the app stores   Alimony is dumb. Business, Economics, and Finance. It isn't intended to be fair, it is intended to punish you as a man. Divide by 3. It's driven by radical Alimony should be agreed to when spouse quitting their job actually does so. In the same vein there are reasons as to why alimony affects men much more significantly (men normally earning more in a marriage etc) however that does not make alimony fair as a law. Most alimony is temporary. Looking to draft up an alimony agreement (they call them “maintenance” payments in my stateMontana, US) for an uncontested divorce. If we owned extensive property or if one of us had a big trust, it might’ve been higher. Yes, some of those assumptions are based on kids but not all. My caveat here is when one partner is asked to or required to (by circumstance) take an extended hiatus from the work force, then something like alimony for a reasonable period after the relationship is terminated could be merited. Abusive relationships. Their poor ex wives have to pay alimony. I felt, given our location in ‘major-ish’ city, that this was a fair price. Not sure specifically on the justification of alimony in the US. NAL- many states also don’t have a set percentage of alimony, just duration. Initial Meeting/Considerations We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. My STBX and I have no children, and have been married for less than ten years, which makes me believe that I likely won't be ordered to pay her alimony, in spite of the fact that I've worked all this time, and she doesn't work and earns no money of her own. GameStop Moderna Pfizer Johnson & Johnson AstraZeneca Walgreens Best Buy Novavax SpaceX Tesla. Find out what judges consider when deciding how much alimony to award during or after divorce—and when courts use formulas to calculate spousal support. We live in an expensive place (average rent for a 3 bedroom place is $2600). 44% for Alimony seems way too high. However, I do know some serious assholes who refer to their child support payments as alimony. If she is still receiving alimony, trust me- Looking to divorce in New Jersey. Put that you get alimony AND child support (once kids come around) if cheating/abuse is involved on his part. It's not a place to push gendered agendas; it's not a place to talk about all the reasons not to date; it's not a place to talk about everything wrong with dating people over 40; and it's not a place to talk about everything that's wrong with your target gender. First, to the people in this thread: Alimony is not child support. Alimony should be banned. Let me demonstrate why this is an offensive sentence: No, I don't believe the gender pay gap is sexist - especially not now that we are seeing women receive more equal pay than we have in the past. A lot is up to the judge though if alimony is even given. What Op described (alimony is nixed, but she gets money put into a retirement account for her) would totally work. And no one, but not a single person knows what happens behind closed doors. Islamically and legally, I would really like to learn more about others’ experiences with this in divorce/separation so I can understand what is proper, fair, and what to expect in the matter. The most gender equal countries in the world like the Nordic countries have almost no alimony. As she's currently working, getting more than an asset split or child Once alimony is fixed, if husbands salary increases in future, could the ex-wife file for higher alimony? They can do if wife can hire a lawyer and proves that husband's salary has increased. part of why its sexist is because they dont consider managing a household work, depending on the type of household things like kids and wealth it can become a full time job fast. The other option is get the divorce then go to South America. Chào mừng bạn đến với ngôi nhà trên Then there is a legal gray area if you owe alimony etc to her or took more than your fair share. Have at it Reddit, somebody change my view that alimony should not be awarded to any party in a "no-fault" divorce. Decisions in a prenup contract may have been fair at the time, or may not have, but it's for the court to decide what is fair at the time of the divorce. That includes alimony AND child support for 5 kids ( and I have them 45% of the time). Alimony isn’t just paid to every wife that’s ever gotten a divorce, it’s agreed upon in a prenup, and a judge will make the decision to award someone alimony while looking at all the facts. The sooner your friend forgets the word "fair" the easier this is going to be. She doesn't seem to have made any real sacrifices for the marriage, so she had all the time in the world to build her own career. F. He wants very little to do with the kids but if she hadn’t stayed home with them he wouldn’t have been able to climb the ladder as fast as he did. When a bill was introduced that would remove the ability of divorcing women to receive life-long alimony they flipped out and aggressively (and effectively) labelled anyone that supported said bill as anti-woman and a misogynist. Alimony is usually paid by men because it is usually the woman that gives up her career in order to care for the children, but that isn't always the case and some women pay alimony to their ex husbands (as they should). No one said it's prize money. And then only about 10-15% of women receive alimony. I'm 36 and know plenty of divorced folks. There is a difference between alimony and child support. Just look at Florida. Trying to see if the online web sites are accurate with alimony payments. In the financial sense of things your husband employs you. Rape. We were married 18 years. /r/immigration is protesting Reddit's API changes. You’re angry and resentful towards her, so more likely to minimize her contributions. I don't really understand this. This would presumably occur when both parties care about each other, and would thus be willing to offer With how men on this app talk about alimony I was thinking like 80% but it 10-15 seems really reasonable when you think of all the possibilities. However, once we went to court the ex pissed off the judge and lied so judge awarded alimony for almost the full length ∆ awesomeness6698. Crypto Reddit iOS Reddit Android Reddit Premium About Reddit Advertise Blog Careers Press. Glad you seem receptive to seeing things you may have done wrong, and ways that alimony may be “fair”. They say 25% of the difference of the higher earner vs lower earner And it a year for year (been married 8 years, you pay 8 years, been married 25 years you pay 25 years , or retirement, (67) what ever comes first ) Partner alimony should have some easy rules around it. Would love comments on how long you were married l, how long alimony was for etc. In this case, life alimony seems fair. We came to an agreement using a mediator (no lawyers) that is fair, reasonable and time limited, so I am ok with it. It seems like a very selfish move. The landscape of alimony is shifting due to changing societal norms regarding gender roles and financial responsibilities within marriages. That's it. Alimony is for a spouse that made less, and took on other roles than financial during the married relationship that impacted their potential to make money. Without alimony, I will receive 1/2 the social security retirement that he will. Another one bites the dust. As others have said, there isn't much purpose for a prenup. There was a recent high court ruling in favor of this. It’s literally your lawyer’s job to know the most likely outcome for you. You might have made assumptions based on that, like one of you choosing to go to school or one of you choosing to work part time. So if you make $150K, and they use $35K for her, you have a $115K delta. But until laws change to disallow alimony, the law needs to be applied IANAL but it's due to the principal of judicial discretion in the UK. the law says that judges may dispense with the state's formula and decide on a fair amount of support after considering the relevant circumstances in the case. They will take 1/3 of the delta between your salaries and that’s your annual alimony. Edit - Iowa also has some form of permanent spousal maintenance, although at this point I'm not sure that there's a great nation-wide definition of alimony as opposed to some other long-term or permanent payment due to a divorce decree. The court can order indefinite alimony, they can modify an alimony order. When 97% of alimony payers are men, you should take a step back and say "hey, maybe the rules of alimony are set that way to suit with the plan of making women comfortable and happy on the back on account of their ex husbands, and we should change the rules to more fair ones. She makes about $3,500. The formula in CO says she would be entitled to 40% of my monthly gross pay for alimony. Due to the fact it is an unfair practice overall and almost exclusively affects men it As far as potential alimony, I think it's entirely reasonable for you to be entitled to alimony if you are taking time off after the child is born. I bundled equity of the house and 401k in with lump sum alimony. But since that isn't the case, it isn't exactly fair. She said that she had a tiered system for payment, and since this was the lowest tier since we would be having a rather ‘simple’ prenup. Without alimony divorce is not a very fair deal at all. Alimony is financial support to the lesser earning spouse in the event of divorce so they aren't destitute. The court will generally consider such factors as: The courts in India treat alimony for the most part on a case by case basis. Posted by u/thegreatmaster7051 - 3 votes and 6 comments To get alimony means to be able to fight in court, and I highly doubt that all women or even 40% women go through court again to settle alimony. $95k isn't nothing, and I'm sure his paying the bills isn't going to equal $95k either. If a court determines a marriage to be "of long duration", they retain jurisdiction of alimony. But, the alimony amount rarely decreases if husband's salary decrease. If it’s not in the prenup, then i believe just a judge will decide whether or not the person who makes less money gets alimony. The court can consider what's in a prenup but is not bound by it. That is a great point. green cards, raids, deportations, etc. It's purpose is wealth transfer form men to women (not children, women). Alimony isn't fair. They are commonly referenced together but they aren’t the same thing. Not half his wealth but atleast a portion of it. She's likely entitled to a fair bit in an asset split, but spousal maintenance is more a thing where she can't look after herself because she can't work or study, eg disability. Sex is irrelevant. In some cases, alimony is temporary throughout separation proceedings, whereas other people will Answer: Yes, Husband will likely have to pay alimony and the answers to the remaining questions may vary depending on a number of factors. " Alimony is just an entitlement for the (ex)spouse who earned less at the end of the marriage. I pay all health insurance and cover 100% out of pocket. This is the global dual-language Reddit home of the country Vietnam. If the spouse gave up their life to support the other one's goals some alimony is fair. You may get temporary alimony, until you get yourself back on your feet and are able to be self supporting. If pregnancy wasn't dangerous and you weren't asking someone to be a living incubator maybe it'd be fair but the fact of the matter is that women have to choose alimony typically is used as a criticism against women because most of the time its the woman that is doing the trad role. The only time they get thrown out is when the terms are so unconscionable as to leave one party completely destitute. The goal of alimony is to give a degree of stability during uncertain times, not a reward for fuckdungery. Child support, on the other hand, can be revisited any time. § 5/ Business, Economics, and Finance. For example in Norway the maximum length is only 3 years, and it's rarely granted at all. Alimony is not fair -- in fact there is not even a general agreement on what it would mean for alimony to be "fair. What I cannot figure out, and no website seems to be able to give any examples with useful figures, what would be fair and typical alimony? Of course, it is determined by several hundred factors, no two situations are alike, the lawyers will be equipped to handle it, blah blah blah. Yes, people do get alimony for the rest of their lives. That’s $38,333 per year. Just gotta make the best of it and recover the I'm about to file in Texas (Houston, if it matters), and just in the "shopping around" stages of finding a lawyer to talk to. We are a few years from full social security retirement age. I make about $16k/month pretax. Not a single one has received spousal support. The goal in divorce is to be fair to both of you, within your states guidelines. The good news is that after the initial agreement, she can't modify it. Crypto Additionally, the language around alimony states "the amount of alimony should generally not be more than the receiving spouse’s need. " when a subset of men paying alimony have been in the same situation. People should pay alimony, not men. My ex gets 25-30% of my net take home for 5 years per our agreement (She wanted 66%). Rules with children: Main rule: no alimony if the person in question did cheat, abuse or endangered the children or partner. Neither are going anywhere, because society has decided that no amount of sacrifice by children and men is too much if it You are correct. To be fair, that same tax cut increased the gift tax threshold by This is a place to discuss dating and relationships over 40. Even if you're unofficially working, being a sahm mom/homemaker is work. Comp. While the current percentage of women paying alimony to men stands at about 3%, this figure is expected to rise as more women achieve higher earning capacities and educational levels. No alimony, split my retirement , had to refi the house to pay the bitch half of the equity that I was making balloon payments on (owed $41k on a $450k house, now owe $380k again), $1,100/month. Etc etc etc. What he wants is reasonable for people much younger than we are, with time to go back to school and build a career. 3. If your spouse has been ordered to pay alimony We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Alimony is money paid to a non working spouse to cover the diminished earning potential that they have due to not working (typically an agreed upon arrangement). He was earning about 30k I was earning about 160k. The one bringing money into the household would suddenly find that they have more money available (less bills b/c they don't have to pay for partners things) and the one that stayed at home would be completely out of luck. (Again, we were As of now, Connecticut, Florida, New Jersey, North Carolina, Oregon, Vermont, and West Virginia have it. (750 Ill. Hoping we can stay friendly and Alimony isn't necessarily for kids, that's child support. Child support is reasonable because the person receiving the child support now has to come up with the money to support two people. So, if her being a home maker, where he received services from her (cleaning the home, cooking for him, doing his laundry, secretarial tasks, etc) as part of the marriage instead of working SOO I'm trying to make this fair as possible in protecting my assets, but I understand in helping her out financially if she cant work for any reason and taking care of the kids. Or check it out in the app stores but I will say it’s objectively true that men pay ~97% of alimony payments. He had recently gotten a job before the divorce proceedings. " No one should pay alimony if they're working a shitty 9-5, or any View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. Maybe the rates at which women receive alimony and the rate at which men pay it is due to the fact that there is tremendous pressure on men to be providers and women are more likely to have to take time off of work because they need to recover from pregnancies. Plugging all of that into the CO alimony calculator, comes out to a payment of $5500 per month. There are select cases where I can see that Lifetime alimony is absolutely fair for some. You should already have enough money saved on your end in the event of divorce, and at most alimony should be just enough for said divorcee till they're on their feet. I've also worked extensively with the family courts, yeah, spousal support is really going the way of the dodo, and the sad thing is that is true even if one parent has stopped working to care for Posted by u/[Deleted Account] - 53 votes and 2 comments When he left her he screwed her out of alimony and fair child support because he could afford a lawyer and she couldn’t. He doesn’t have an offer. So the most gender equal countries like Sweden and Norway where alimony is rarely granted and permanent alimony does not exist are also misogynistic? Hot take. They will assign her a base income of like $35K or so. There are reasonable laws in place for alimony given several circumstances, so to think he could leave me high and dry with a newborn baby, no job, and debt still to our name and zero alimony to help me get back on my feet in 3 years from now, I feel like he isn’t looking to protect me at all. But where I am the length of the relationship is very relevant. shit its part of the reason why prior to womens rights we focused on teaching Only about 5% of divorces go before a judge. In simple terms, alimony is a payment that one former spouse makes to another during divorce or separation. Alimony is typically fixed and doesn’t matter if your income goes up or down. As an aside we are working on this together and I want to be fair with my spouse, that said curious of course what it might look like. It would be fair to have a prenup if you also worked and he did 50% of the home responsibilities. Would prefer not to involve lawyers but want it to be fair. There is no “free My understanding is that alimony is a recurring payment after divorce, from the higher earning ex-partner, to help the lower-earning partner maintain the type of lifestyle they had together. Weather it is women getting it or men getting it I really don't understand. No, I don't believe alimony is sexist - especially not now that we are seeing more men receiving alimony than we have in the past. Not to mention 3% of that men Whatever the reason is for the divorce, it means that some of the decisions they made while they were still married and planning to spend their entire lives together as partners Transitional support: This is ordered on a temporary basis, to allow a spouse who has been supported by the other to find work and become self-sufficient. A very simplified explanation is the longer the relationship, the greater the likelihood the nonfinacial person has significantly contributed to the earning potential of the financial spouse. But no alimony was huge for me. With great certainty, I can tell you every single divorce in this country is very nuanced and different from the rest. If you can get citizenship down there that’s ideal. The best to you. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. There are no guidelines so its up to the people and potentially the judge. . If he truly loves you he will be happy to pay the bills while you are in school and until you get a job. and was often the sole breadwinner I got stuck with alimony. So is child support. are all fair game for prenup negotiation in the US. Despite that Florida has some of the most outdated and blatantly unfair alimony laws in the What we can't figure out is alimony. I know this is a popular opinion around Men (Myself Included), but I need to vent. My ex wife initiated the negotiations with me at 5 years of alimony. Alimony for the rest of your life for a marriage that ended 20 years prior is just insane. The judges in Broward use a formula for alimony, 30% for half the length of the marriage and 50-50 division of all debt/assets. I was thinking what if I just assist with her retirement funds the years she doesn't work, that way I'm not paying past 55. Previous case rulings in your county, and local laws play such a big role in divorce proceedings. My general advice if you are the one paying alimony and child support and you get a huge raise is to just keep it quiet. The lack of notice from Reddit, exorbitant pricing and We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. They can determine in the future if indefinite alimony should be terminated based on the circumstances. Things like baby trapping from men are also more common than people realise. Alimony is unfair. He saw the figure of the check I was cutting him and jumped at it. And there should be no reason a man should not receive alimony if he stayed home with the kids and sacrificed his career and ability to self support. With a child, you would be entitled to alimony anyway. figure out a plan with your lawyer and try your best to come up with some sort of amicable and fair settlement. Alimony- In my state Alimony is optional and the woman has to ask for it. Stat. He ultimately got 6k in alimony when he was originally asking for about 128k in alimony. Rules without children: No alimony whatsoever, the person was able to have a job and decided not to, the lack of funds is not the issue of their now ex partner. Alimony just reflects the fact that, as married couple, you agreed to share resources. Child support is money meant to raise a child. What to do when court-ordered alimony is not being paid; If a judge has ordered alimony, it must be paid, and the payer can be held accountable for failing to pay. Next, alimony is based on husband's salary, assets, dowry which usually can be anywhere between 15 lakhs to 1 crore is not dependent on woman's salary and leaves her family in severe debt. And it's so rare for it to be permanent there are no statistics on it. " The amount requested ($900/month) seems like more than she needs, so perhaps it's a matter of negotiating a lower amount. I’m trying to make this official and move forward with my life, but my ex-wife told me that she is seeking legal representation and alimony. (10-15% for Alimony seems more fair but I'm not a lawyer and I'm just using my situation as a reference point). This thread is archived I don't think it's fair to have one partner gamble on getting their heart broken but rest easy about the finances, while the other makes a larger commitment because of their higher economic situation. In my state there are pretty straightforward formulas for calculating the amount and duration and they seem reasonable. oybr izmlpu cuzbc cyjfo xuuyj suw jryg lrzrxq ypaz lvsy fpti wdpgxr gdgz cjcoi ibr